Dear Stuck Waiting...

Dear Stuck Waiting,

I know. I really do. You are everyone, and just you. You are hanging on to hope, about to give up, or burying your dreams. You feel like you are stuck in the middle of your story while others have reached the end of theirs. And you're not just waiting in line, waiting in traffic, waiting for your number to be called...you're waiting for something big. Something long dreamed of. Something just out of your reach.

Dearest Stuck Waiting, you could be waiting for one of many things...or many things combined. The dream job, school to finish, a husband, a baby, a house. You might be stuck waiting for that clean bill of health, that promotion, or that prodigal child to come home. Maybe what has you waiting is a deep trench of depression that you're longing to finally get out of.

You might be resentful when other people seemingly effortlessly reach their goals. You might be asking "WHY?" "Why do I have to wait, while they don't?" "Why isn't it my turn?" "WHY???" You might have your head hung low while you kick a pebble in frustration and resignation; you might think, "This won't ever happen anyway. Why hope?" Or you might be strapped into an emotional rollercoaster...pulse racing, chugging up the hill of "Maybe This Time!" only to hurtle down the steep incline of "Nope, not this time." That negative pregnancy test. That big repair that wipes out your savings. That rejection letter from that college...somehow they have a way of taking you low. So low that you want to get off the ride.

Isn't there something that feels so vulnerable about waiting? It's as if the hard exterior you carry through life is null and void when you think about your dreams. That titanium shell around your heart is replaced by a fragile egg shell, and it won't take much disappointment for it to crack. And when it breaks, it takes so much effort to clean up the mess. Yet, you still wait.

Stuck Waiting, you show courage. Because it takes a heart containing the least amount of courage to continue to dream. Disappointments bash your built up dreams against the rocks of adversity, and yet you choose to build again. You are a stouthearted soul. If all that is left of your desires are embers, please allow me to put a few logs on for you.

Waiting doesn't have to be a powerless place where you get weaker with each passing minute. It doesn't have to keep you at a stand-still. Waiting can be a place of strength.  It's like a gym where atrophied faith muscles can be conditioned, toned, and built. Although sweat is poured out, and you don't think you can hold on for much longer, little by little you are getting stronger. With each passing moment, waiting can add inches of pure, lean muscle to your flagging faith if you place your hope from your dream to your All Powerful God.

So let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don't give up, or quit. Galatians 6:9

But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, they run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind. Isaiah 40:31

You don't have to be Stuck Waiting anymore; for there is nothing "stuck" about waiting on God. You are in constant motion. You are leaning into God's goodness; you are Strengthened in Waiting. May this waiting season find you not aimlessly flapping your wings, but stretching them and letting the warm currents of God's strength lift you up- conserving your energy, increasing your altitude, and letting you see the bird's eye perspective. This is a wait that will not go to waste.

Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord. Psalm 27:14

In Celebration of Anna

Thank you, Disney, for adding much needed excitement to cold and snow.

It was a year ago that my children and I first saw Disney's Frozen. It didn't take long for us all to be sucked into the snowflake littered vortex of the story line. Two deceased monarchs. A mysterious Queen. Adorable trolls. I leaned back with the somehow in tact Jr Mints I had smuggled into my Mary Poppins purse, and mused, "I bet there are going to be a WHOLE lot of Queen Elsa's at Halloween." I am now certain I wasn't the first one to think that.

What was it about Queen Elsa that was so alluring? The fact that she was not a Disney Princess- she was a QUEEN? The insane powers (ice castle? no problem!) that coursed through her veins? Or of course, the amazing set of pipes she possessed?

I drove home after the movie, and tried processing what I saw. Sure it was funny, and clever, and the musical score was epic. But I searched the stony heap of the storyline for the one jewel I could polish and keep. Embedded into the tapestry of film, was a crimson thread of love. Tucked into the heart of the film was the constant theme of sacrifice. And it was her love for her sister that melted her own frozen heart. In this film, Anna was the real hero.

Although Elsa had incredible powers, she was kept prisoner by fear. The fear growing in her heart made it impossible to let others in. It thrived in her growing powers and built walls, icy spears, and even a castle to keep others away. She could deceive herself into thinking she was free, thinking all she had to do was "let it go" to find peace, but peace eluded her.

In stark contrast, Anna had everything to lose. She desperately wanted a relationship with her sister- and endured a lifetime of rejection as a reward. Unlike others who saw Elsa's powers as repulsive, Anna was drawn to her sister all the more fervently. She pursued, she traveled, she fought, and she even employed the help of a burly, odorous ice cutter to win her sister back.

Some would view Queen Elsa as the one in power, and in fact, they would be right. After all, it was her voice echoing across the mountain on that wintery night that "the cold doesn't bother [her] anyway". But Anna's power came in the form of lips pursed through a keyhole saying, "do you wanna build a snowman?" or a determined fist knocking on a frigid door or trekking up the side of a punishing mountain just to see her sister's face.

There is something so vulnerable about loving. True love risks being hurt. True love risks being misunderstood. True love risks being rejected. But the following is also true of love: "Perfect love drives away all fear." 1 Jn 4:18 Pure love thaws; true love heals. Love didn't seek it's own way; it sought to serve and protect. Love didn't shrink back in fear; instead, it pursued. Love didn't run away at its weakest point, but with its last free motion, put up a hand in between a sword's blow and a crushed sister. That reminds me of Christ's love on the cross. With one of His last breaths, Jesus cried, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." Love sees beyond the here and now, and forgives those who wound out of their own short sightedness.

There may not have been a plethora of little Anna's this past Halloween, but one thing is true; Anna's love is to be celebrated. Her love is to be emulated. Courage is not found in those who run and hide; courage is found in those who choose to love. Let's dare to be brave in our relationships, and in this world, and love with the same fervor as Anna...but more than her, Jesus. Will we come out on top? There are no guarantees. But we will win.